Cookie Cutter Cliche's

This has been a week! Someone who used to be close to me was kind enough to give me a list of how I should change so I would be able to find my own man, instead of having to "put up with" "sharing a husband" and helping to raise some other woman's children. I am growing closer to another couple. As I have been going through boxes and finding homes for my treasures, old memories keep creeping closer. I was asked why I wanted to be poly and told I should just forget about it.

Just when I was feeling like my world was just going topsy turvey, I found a friend. I had to move to a new place to take care of a family member a few months ago. I gave up a really nice job, the only church that ever really felt like home, and day to day interaction with many of my real life friends. I was feeling a bit alone this week.

Turns out, she and her husband are very open to new loves and "playing" with new friends. They are also long-time nudists---I would never have guessed! Really! They are the most loving people I have met in this crazy town. It felt soooo incredibly good to meet some non-judging, non-Puritans. I know it sounds crazy, but it felt so freeing to be around any one, any one at all who was tangible, accepting, and had a different idea. They are soo happy! Their relationship is mature and healthy. I was starting to feel like I lived in Stepford.

Perhaps, I should write a posts on all the benefits that poly provides. All the reasons why this is my first CHOICE for a family, not a hail Mary or quick fix. Anyone up for a poly positive post? I will say that poly has very little to do with sharing a husband. Any guy who still holds on to the fantasy that he alone is so good that he must be shared and in control of two adoring, robot women without free will, should have his head examined. Poly is about gaining 2 or more people in your life who will love and care for you 100% and who you will love and care for 100%. You put them before yourself. They put you first. Three people tend and nurture the marriage. Three people are there forever, in sickness and health, for better or worse....etc, etc, etc forever. All children should be equally valued, loved, and have the benefit of all parents.

The very idea that I can change myself to meet someone else's standards for love or mold myself into an ordinary person (thus giving up the vibrant woman I am) in order to achieve someone else's cookie cutter cliche' of a dream for my life is so incredibly offensive!

One of my favorite quotes:
Well-behaved women rarely make history.

I am spending this weekend dancing and cleaning out the goofballs in my life. I am a whole person who is worthy of love. I will find a lifetime love, on my own terms. Maybe that love is closer to me than I think.